My "New" Waistline

A few weeks ago I was getting dressed in front of the full length mirror in my bedroom that I have so vehemently averted over the past year when out of the corner of my eye I noticed... What in the? Could it be true? Was it the start of my waistline? I couldn't be sure because I always tip my full length mirror at an upward angle to ensure my reflection body is always three inches taller and ten pounds thinner than my flesh body. But after spinning around in the mirror a few times I was convinced that, yes, it was indeed the start of my waistline. Let's be clear. My new waistline looks nothing like my old waistline. There is no trace of an abdominal muscle in sight, and my "hourglass" figure looks as though it has been warped in the dishwasher. But it is a sign that maybe my metabolism was just dormant for the past nine months rather than gone, lost forever.

I got pretty cocky and started dusting off all of my old pants. To my surprise, I could pull most of them up for the first time since I found out I was pregnant. I could even button some of them, and I will, too, whenever I feel like sporting a muffin top. But for now, I'm happy to be able to slip into a pair of jeans that require the assistance of a hair rubber band rather than an entire waistline of elastic.

ALERT! ALERT! ALERT!

READER BEWARE. There is a serial thief in the neighborhood. The accused is known to target innocent ducks, puppies, and elephants. Victims have been found in their own homes and are reportedly chewed, bitten, and smothered before being left for dead. Authorities need your help in identifying the victims.


The perp has been described as being male with shiny, brown hair and long, floppy ears. If you see this villain alert the authorities immediately and proceed with caution. Do not be fooled by his innocent demeanor. He will attack anything that is soft, fluffy, and squeaky.


(According to authorities, a more recent photo of the perp was not available as his parents have neglected him since his sister was born seven months ago.)

Chloe - 7 Months

Well it has almost been a whole month since my last post, because things at work just seem to be getting busier and busier. I figured I had better post something about Chloe's 7th month before I forget about all of the amazing things she learned! Chloe is now officially crawling. What started as an army crawl turned into an army crawl + two quick real crawls + fall on face, repeat.


All of this eventually turned into a full on crawl. By the end of the month miss girl could crawl all the way across the room and back, and boy, did she think she was cool shit.


At the very end of the month she decided, hey, if I can crawl, I can probably stand up. So she gave it a whirl. One night when I got home from work she started crawling over to me with this devilish little look on her face. You could just tell she was thinking "I'm gonna get you!" Then she grabbed a hold of me and pulled herself right up. And that, ladies and gentlemen, was the end of it. She has since made it her sole purpose in life to crawl over to things, pull herself up, and look over her shoulder at us silently thinking "neener, neener, neener." And poor Griffin. He gets the worst of it. She pulls herself up on his face, ears, tummy, tail, you name it. But he just sits there, probably thinking about how he can't wait to turn eighteen.


Chloe is talking now more than ever. I think she sounds like a baby dinosaur. She is always squealing, growling, or roaring. It is so funny. She never really figured out how to laugh. Instead, when she is excited she just screeches. The only way she will really, truly belly laugh is if Griffin is barking or playing because Griffin is hilarious.

Since Melissa took two weeks of vacation in August, my dad volunteered to take some vacation to come watch Chloe. Dad watched Chloe a total of six days in August, but I'm pretty sure it only took one day before he was wrapped her finger. Chloe loves my dad and it was so cute to see her with him. Now she loves pretty much anyone with facial hair.

Chloe still loves all of the same things like being outdoors, Griffin, stroller rides, and music, but this month she decided that the really loves to play. She loves playing with toys that light up and make noise. My mom picked up some toys from a few garage sales because all of the toys I had at home for her were soft, quiet, and boring. She has a big basket of toys in the living room now, but she still seems to go after anything that is not a toy. She is always trying to get Griffin's nasty toys and once when I looked away for a split second I looked down to find Chloe chewing on Griffin's gnarly Nylabone.

We are having all sorts of fun chasing Chloe around the house these days. Here is her 7 month photo.