Chloe Notes

For a little while I was taking time to jot down a few stories about these crazy kids.  These are all a little old now, but I figured I ought to post them anyway.

January 27, 2013 - Chloe is obessed with cats.  Cats are probably her most favorite thing in the world right now.  Maybe even higher on the list than Papa.  We were visiting our friends who have a cat named Zoe.  Chloe spent maybe 70% of her weekend chasing the cat around the house.  She had a conversation with me that went something like this, "Mom.  Mom.  MOM.  Cats have TAILS!  Cats have buttholes under their tails.  Cats have poop on their buttholes.  I have a butthole, but I don't have poop on my butthole.  Cats have FUR!  Cats are soft and you have to pet them like this.  Cats have up ears.  I have side ears.  I LOVE CATS!!" 

February 3, 2013 - Chloe is obessed with informing me that girls have a penis and boys have a vagina.  Except it sounds more like "boys hab a penis and girs hab a bagina."  Somehow every conversation can be brought back to those two anatomical parts.  Griffin hab a penis.  Abram hab a penis.  Daddy hab a penis. 

February 10, 2013 - This morning Chloe and I were sitting on the couch.  She was playing with a toy laptop, and I was talking to my friend, Lydia.  I overheard the following:

Laptop: What do you like to play?
Chloe: Outside.

Laptop: Who is your best friend?
Chloe: My Mom.

Heart. Melt.

February 11, 2013 - This morning I was getting ready in the downstairs bathroom.  I always pull Abram's high chair over to where I'm getting ready.  I toss him scraps every now and then to keep him occupied.  A raisin here, a blueberry there.  Graham cracker.  Banana.  As long as I'm feeding him he is content.  Well, for whatever reason this morning he was being a grump and was throwing everything on the floor.  Chloe came over, threw her hand on her hip and said, "NO, NO ABRAM!  Do not throw your food on the floor.  You naughty, naughty boy.  Now Mommy is going to have to clean all this up!!!"

February 12, 2013 - It was a rough morning, this one.  For some reason Chloe peed the bed TWICE last night.  She never pees the bed.  She never has.  She has been an expert at potty training since she started.  She has never worn a pull up, wakes up in the middle of the night if she needs to go, and can hold her pee forever in the mornings.  I'm not sure why she peed twice last night, but the second time was directly on the mattress, which was super awesome.  It really got the day started off right. 

When Abram woke up he woke up screaming his balls off.  He would not stop screaming.  Crying, screaming, sobbing.  Nothing I could do could stop him, so finally I just let him sit there crying.  I asked Chloe if she could figure out what was wrong with him.  He followed her into the kitchen and she poured a bag of raisins out on the floor.  I nearly yelled at her, but I realized that he had stopped crying for the first time in 45 minutes.  She emptied the rest of the cherries out on the floor.  I told her that was enough.  He was laughing.  She said, "There, Mom.  Now he is happy!"  Damn.  She's right.

I ran upstairs quickly to grab our clothes and shuttered when I heard what sounded like chip bags. Sure enough, when I came downstairs I found a pile of pita chips, tortilla chips, saltine crackers, and Cheerios added to the raisin/cherry mix.  Nice.

Abram - 15/16 Months

Hey bud.  You are already 16 months old (actually, I wrote this at 14/15 months, updated it to include 16 months, but now you are nearly 17 months... eek!).  I missed the last many months of updates, and for that I am sorry.  Lately, it seems I don't have a single spare moment left in my life to update this darn blog.  Ever since your first birthday I have been spending my mornings working out or cleaning the house before you kids wake up.  I'm writing this now while you nap.  Chloe is by my side "helping" me with my paper notebook, which I have been using to jot down tidbits about you kids.  What she is actually doing is kicking me and trying to touch the buttons with her toes.  And she is saying "say, 'you don't know how to open that notebook.  You are only three.'," which is her "thing" right now, because she does know how to open the notebook, and the joke's always on me. 

You have come so far over the past few months.  You started walking between 13 and 14 months, and while you still look a little drunk while you walk, you are getting so much faster - like, almost running.  You are surprisingly clumsy, but that is just me comparing you to your sister at your same age.  You are probably just normal.  Regardless, you are always bumping your head on things.  Right now you have a scratch across your forehead and a bruise on your cheek.  Add that to the eczema below your eyes and your adorable face is pretty banged up.  It doesn't matter, though, because everywhere we go people always comment on how cute you are.  You are such a cheeseball, smiling at everyone.  Here is a video from when you first started walking.

Now that you can walk you are so busy!  You remind me of a pinball machine, always bouncing around the room from one toy to the next.  Your daddy taught you how to go up and down the stairs, and even though Chloe is always reminding you to "turn around" when you go down the stairs, you still insist on trying to go down the stairs face first.  You try to go down on your butt and flash your little shit grin.

Your favorite thing in the entire world is your pacifier, and like any true addict, I'm convinced you would choose that pacifier over your family, food, water, or shelter.  My rule is to keep the pacifier in the crib, but in the mornings you have started throwing massive tantrums when I take it from you.  We let you have it in the grocery store or car, because you would seriously just sit there for an entire lifetime being a perfect angel as long as you had that thing in your mouth.  You also love the crooked, blue and white, polka dot blanky Grammy made for you.  She hates that crooked blanky, but you don't see a single flaw in it when you snuggle up to it.

Other toys/things you love right now are super random, and it makes me laugh when I think of you always carrying them around.  They are as follows:

1. The doll house toilet
2. The Christmas snow globe

3. The stethoscope
4. The stuffed dog
5. These shoes (which at 16 months you would wear 24/7 if given the choice)

 

6. The coat pictured here (again, 24/7)

You love sitting in kid chairs.  You love playing in your sister's room, because she has a Pottery Barn chair, a rocking chair, and two pink princess folding chairs.  With the stethoscope around your neck and the doll house toilet in hand, you go from chair to chair, stopping only to dance to the beat of the snow globe music.  You love to dance, but your only move is to walk in a circle while waving your arms and clapping your hands.  It's super cute, though!

You are such a good eater.  Your all time favorite food right now is a pile of shredded cheese.  You go to the fridge and point at the cheese drawer.  You also love Greek yogurt.  In March, your Papa let you feed yourself Greek yogurt, and ever since then you insist on doing it yourself.  Things get pretty messy, but you are so proud of yourself!

You also love pancakes and berries.  You have such a sweet tooth.  On Easter Sunday you refused to eat anything that wasn't candy or chocolate.  You were just completely out of control.  The next day I found all kinds of tin foil in your poop, because you were trying to eat milk chocolate eggs with the foil on and everything.  You crazy baby!

Your favorite person is easily Chloe.  You think she is so funny.  She will pretend to hiccup and you will laugh so hard you actually get the hiccups.  She can get you to stop crying by just making a funny face at you. 

You used to be a total Daddy's boy, because Chloe was a total Mama's girl.  She never let me hold you or play with you, because she was so demanding of my time.  When we got back from vacation she took her anger out on me and became a Daddy's girl.  As a result, you and I have gotten loads of snuggle time, and most of the time you chase me around the house wanting to be picked up and snuggled.  Something cute you do is walk over to me when I'm sitting Indian style on the floor and just plop your little butt down in my legs.  Then you just sit there, like that was a seat made just for you.  I love to kiss you on your neck behind your ear.  You have these wild curls on the back of your head, and you are just irresistibly cute.