Big Weekend!

It was a big weekend for our little Chloe Amelia. We headed back to Chesaning for the first time since January. Chloe and Griff both traveled well and we made it home with no major emotional or physical injuries.

Friday night we headed up to the Riverfront Grill for dinner and drinks. Grandma and Grandpa R joined us for dinner and then took Miss Chloe home so that Mommy and Daddy could enjoy a night out. We met Jason & Krissy, Kendra & Chad, David, Kylee & Ryan, and Katie and enjoyed some adult beverages from 9 to 12. It wasn't too crazy of a night, but it was our first night "out" nonetheless.

Saturday we brought Chloe to Kate's shower where she got to meet all of her Great Aunts and second cousins. I found my daughter only once to feed her and the rest of the time she was passed around from one adoring fan to the next. I really enjoyed the break! Andrew and Chloe were showered with kisses!





Saturday night Grandma and Grandpa T got to babysit while Paul and I went to Sara & Matt's couples shower. Getting out of the house was interesting as I scurried around to find dress clothes that would actually fit. While I did have a perfect pregnancy and birth, and yes I am so lucky to have a healthy baby, I have only lost 20 of my 40 pregnancy pounds. That is something like the baby + placenta + amniotic fluid and nothing more. I know, I know - I just had a baby, but I can't walk around with a sign on my forehead that says "I know I'm chubby, but I just had a baby." It is tough going from a tone, flat belly to a jiggly, round one! Other than getting dressed, the night was a success and we had a great time with Sara and Matt at the shower.

Sunday morning we went to my Great Grandma Vrable's house to capture a five generation photo. Great Grandma is a natural with babies as she had 13 children. She also has something like 55+ grandchildren, 65+ great grandchildren, and 10 or so great great grandchildren.

The Ladies of Bradley

Some of my favorite moments of the day are spent in prayer. I often talk to God the way I talk to my friends in that I tend to ramble and often veer off course. Last night I was getting excited for this morning when I get to see the ladies of Bradley at our weekly meeting, and as I was giving thanks for the hope of a new day I got to thinking of how God's path led me straight to these new friends.

I traced it as far back as buying this house. Last summer I spent a lot of time with my neighbor Julianne. When I told her I was pregnant we got to talking about her pregnancy. I told her I wanted to have a natural childbirth and she said that she had a natural birth using the Bradley Method. I had never heard of Bradley and probably never would have heard of it if it weren't for Julianne. Julianne's friend and neighbor, Angie, said that her friends were planning to use the Bradley Method and planned to have a home birth. I thought that her friends must be a bunch of crazy hippies. Little did I know that Paul and I would sit right next to them at our first Bradley Meeting!

I signed up for the last Bradley class of the year on the last possible day. Most of the couples had been signed up for months. I will never forget the first day when we were introducing ourselves and Sally and Michael (aka crazy hippies) went right before us. They talked about their interests, which included their community garden and essentially sustainable living. They also talked about their home birth. Paul and I had to go next... I said something like "yeaaah we aren't very healthy people." I proceeded with our interests that included things like watching television, eating fried foods, playing with our dog, and being lazy. Things like that. I remember thinking that of the five couples gathered in the basement, we couldn't all be more different! Never in a million years did I think we would end up being friends.

But one week we had a night off from class and instead of staying home, Sally suggested we have a dinner party at her house. I think it was about week 7 or 8 of the class so we knew each other a little bit, but not really that well. So we gathered one Monday night for soup, salad, and nonalcoholic beverages. We had a great time and stayed up uncharacteristically late for a group of pregnant women.

We continued to stay in touch once we finished the class and visited each other soon after having our babies. We had our Bradley Reunion two weekends ago, which is best put into words in Sally's blog. More importantly, the ladies of Bradley have been meeting every Wednesday at the Baby Beloved meeting. It is a breastfeeding support group and I think that we actually just use the meeting as an excuse and prelude to our luncheons at Sally's house. That is where we really connect and gripe and fawn over our little ones all at once.

It is wonderful to have a group of friends that is going through the exact same experience. It is effortless to bond with these ladies. They are my war buddies. Together we went through the pregnancy, the birth, and the breastfeeding struggles, and who knows what new challenges we will face together in the future. All I know is that I have God to thank for introducing us to these great people and I am so amazed at the intricacy of His plan. I think that God knew I would need these women for support, and their influence on my life thus far is unmeasurable.

I read this verse recently. In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps. Proverbs 16:9 It is so interesting to see how all of the small decisions we make in life are actually part of a grander plan. I think that sometimes the biggest challenge is not being able to see the big picture. While the bigger moments of our lives are what tend to define us, it is the smaller moments that lead us there, and I am so grateful for all of the small decisions that led us to our new friends.

Bradley babies from left to right: Sofia, Elouise, Miles, Josie, and Chloe



Bradley mommies from right to left in birth order: Sally, Sarah, Me (I'm a line jumper. I was supposed to be last!), Monica, and Bethany

Who Does She Look Like?

This is probably the question we have been asked most often. To be honest, Chloe seems to be a perfect blend of the two of us. Most of Paul's baby pictures were lost in the fire a few years ago so we don't have a good idea of what he looked like as a baby. She definitely has my mouth, but I think she resembles Paul from the nose up. Right now she has Paul's skin tone. Thank God! I prayed for her that she wouldn't get my pale, moley, easily sunburnable skin. She is olive colored just like Paul. I have a vision of a 15 year old Chloe saying "Oh my gosh mom you burn so easily" as she rubs tanning oil all over her beautiful tan skin and I apply my second coat of 45 sunblock. Unfortunately, both Paul and I have huge feet. I, in particular, have super long toes and she seems to have inherited those. I pray that she gets a few extra inches of height to balance out her large feet. Chloe's hair is still dark brown, but it does seem to be lightening up a bit. Both Paul and I were bald when we were babies and I am surprised that her hair hasn't fallen out yet. It is so fluffy and cute and I hope that it doesn't fall out!

One Month Update

At one month I would venture to guess that Chloe has passed the 9 pound mark. She feels a lot heftier now and is much easier to handle. As I lug her around I find myself thanking God for blessing us with an early baby. I think the three extra pounds would have made a world of difference.





I have been struggling to find time to post an update. For a couple of weeks Chloe's naughtiest time was from 10:00 am to 2:00 pm when Paul was gone at work. In the rare case that she was sleeping peacefully in this time period I was dedicating my potential moments of sanity toward my job that continues to haunt me even during maternity leave. I have solved this problem by *gasp* putting Chloe down for naps on her tummy. I figure that since I am watching her she is probably fine to sleep on her tummy and Griffin and I rejoice in the silence. Yesterday I was able to do a quick workout and dust our entire house! Still, her favorite place to nap is in her Moby Wrap which has paid for itself ten times over. If I were keeping score it would be something like Chloe 2 and Moby Wrap 30. The weeks prior to the tummy naps were a struggle. Chloe would spend most of the day wailing so much so that I thought she had Colic. She would end up taking five to ten minute naps and would get overtired.

At night Chloe is still sleeping in her swing next to our bed. We didn't want to spend the $150 for a bassinet and she feels comfortable in the swing so it works for us. Generally speaking, Chloe sleeps through the night, but wakes up every four hours to eat, and I couldn't be happier. She absolutely must be swaddled at night because she is the squirmiest baby around. I'm not kidding either. You may think your baby is squirmy until you meet this girl. I think it is because she is so gassy. I think that I have discovered Chloe's gas was from the citrus in my diet. It was either that or dairy. I have quit drinking my morning glass of OJ and she farts for five minutes a day instead of an hour :o) Oh the riveting life of a new mother. Chlo's gas has crowned her the king of toots around this house (a momentous feat) and we have dubbed her Tootsie for now.

At one month Chloe is a very nosy baby. When she is awake she is very alert and she seems to study everything. She is also superwoman strong. She holds her head up for over thirty seconds and is getting less and less bobbley by the day. She also has the classic baby death grip for things that should not be death gripped like hair and necklaces.

We are completely smitten with our new baby girl and I have been enjoying every minute at home with her. Pretty soon, though, the money will run out and I will have to return to work. I spent some time looking for daycare prior to Chloe's arrival, but we only visited two places. Originally I wanted someone to come to our home while I worked from home, but I became increasingly frightened by this option after hearing a horror story about a shaken baby. The more I read about hiring a nanny the more I stressed about it. They should have a clear driving and criminal record, they should be CPR certified, they should have good references, etc. Really the most important interview question for a nanny is "Do you shake babies" and who is really going to say "You bet"? We are meeting with a lady today who has glowing references and runs a small daycare out of her home. She sounded angelic on the phone and she thinks she has space for a newborn. I look forward to meeting her. My mom has agreed to watch Chloe on Thursdays and Fridays, while Bobby Kay agreed to watch her once per week as well. We feel very blessed to have them come watch Chloe. Not only will it save us a boatload of money, but Chloe will get to spend a lot of time with her grandmas and will receive the best possible care!

Photo Shoot

Chloe had her first photo shoot on Friday. Here are some of my favorites!

The First Two Weeks

Paul called my parents right when we were admitted to the hospital. They made it to the hospital about 15 minutes after Chloe was born. Unfortunately, Grandma and Grandma T were still visiting Henry in Texas and they weren't able to meet Chloe until February 2. My mom held Chloe from about 3:00 am until about 6:00 am on Sunday morning before she left to get some sleep. When we woke up Aunt Kendra was the first to arrive. After that, the visitors kept rolling in. We were so exhausted, but were so excited to share Chloe with our closest friends and family. The hospital stay was nice. I elected to stay the additional night because I quite enjoyed being catered to by nurses and having the world's most qualified babysitters watch Chloe at night. We left the hospital on Tuesday around 11:30 am. We got Chloe all dressed up in her cute going home outfit, which she yakked on shortly afterwards. I sat in the back seat with her on the way home even though I said I wouldn't.







My parents stayed at our house Tuesday night through Thursday night. My parents were amazing. My mom cleaned my house and did the laundry that was piling up in the basement and my dad cooked us dinner each night. I never had a chance to "nest" and so the help was greatly needed and appreciated. The first few nights with Chloe at home were a struggle. She screamed bloody murder and refused to sleep in her crib. We played musical chairs sticking her in her crib, swing, bouncy seat, and back to her crib. Ultimately, she just wanted to be held. I was a nervous wreck and was terrified to let her sleep alone. Each time we sat her in her crib I found myself staring at the monitor with my eyes glazed over in a cold sweat. She is just the world's loudest sleeper. She grunts and makes choking noises and it is just enough to drive a new parent bonkers. When morning came, Chloe fell asleep nicely and remained a peaceful little angel until nightfall.

We struggled a lot with breastfeeding the minute we brought her home. Because the books say to do so I was trying to feed Chloe every 2-3 hours. This resulted in her again screaming bloody murder. When she slept she would make sad faces and I think she was having nightmares of me sticking my big boob in her face when she wasn't even hungry! Once I figured out that she wanted to eat every four hours and the world didn't stop turning and my baby didn't in fact die from doing so, the struggles of breastfeeding eventually worked themselves out. I can see how so many women give up breastfeeding in the early weeks of infancy. It's just downright hard. But in the end I believe the benefits outweigh the struggles. While I'm not one of those crazy advocates of breastfeeding, I do think you'd be hard pressed to find a doctor that didn't agree that "breast is best," and who doesn't want to give their child every possible chance to be the healthiest and smartest baby she can be? I can tell you one thing, though. I don't think we will end up saving one dollar from breastfeeding. This kid poops about every hour and we have gone through more diapers than I could have ever imagined!

I would like to note here that I did have a postpartum day the Wednesday after we brought Chloe home. I didn't cry or do anything too crazy, but I snapped on Paul a good four or five times. He'd say something as innocent as "Hey Cass" and I would respond with a "WHAT PAUL?@?!@?" Something like that. In my mind I remember thinking "okaaay psycho!" but I just couldn't help it. Thankfully, it was business as usual by the next day!

After my parents left, Paul and I decided to have Chloe sleep in the bassinet in her Pack n' Play. We have it set up downstairs because it has a changing table and bassinet. It is a nice to have a little work station downstairs when the stitches in your girl parts make it particularly unfortunate feeling to go up and down the stairs. As a result, we ended up sleeping on the couch for the first two weeks of Chloe's life. It turns out that you don't care where you sleep when your newborn baby is sleeping four hours in a row (yes, that includes letting her sleep on your chest despite the warnings). The past two nights, however, Paul and I have graduated to our bed. Chlo is sleeping in her swing and she had one good night and one bad night. If she sleeps all day you can pretty much guarantee that she is going to be up all night. But sometimes she is fussy during the day and we reap the rewards at night.

Chloe got her first sponge bath the Thursday we brought her home. She HATED it! She screamed the entire time and I felt pretty bad for her. She had her first real bath on Monday and I had to laugh at how much she LOVED it. She just sat there in the water all spread eagle with her body completely limp and relaxed. She could have bathed all day.

For those of you wondering how our first born is handling our new addition, Griffin seems pretty indifferent. It was almost like he expected us to come home with Chloe. He likes to sit on the same couch as her and be near her, and he likes to check that she is still in her bassinet. But other than that it is pretty much business as usual. He has only been jealous so far of my dad holding Chloe because my dad is Griffin's favorite human being in the world. He does get a little annoyed when she refuses to sleep at night, but who can blame him?



Paul has been home for two weeks and is going back to work starting tomorrow. I'm not sure how single mothers come home alone and take care of a baby. I could barely get off of the couch for the first week. So far we have been just enjoying our time together as a family. We spend most of our time downstairs just napping, watching TV, and playing Call of Duty while the baby sleeps. It sounds rough, I know, but we need the relaxing days to balance out the stressful nights. I have loved these past two weeks and I'm sad that Paul has to go back to work.

How Could I Forget?

The thing I failed to mention in my last post is probably the most important part of our successful natural birth. I would have never ever been able to handle the contractions without the help of my confident, calm husband. I remember thinking that there is no way in the whole world I could give birth to Chloe without my husband right by my side. He swears he didn't do anything, of course, but he was really a blessing. The Bradley Method is actually known as The Bradley Method: Husband Coached Childbirth. I was nervous about having Paul as my coach given the amount of joking around we did in our classes. When it came down to it, Paul had his books out and was studying each sign of labor. He was by my side reminding me to stay calm and breathe deeply through each contraction. He filled my water bottle and made sure I kept eating. He reminded me to switch positions every half hour to an hour. He was amazing.

Paul actually wanted to go to the hospital much earlier in the day, but I wouldn't budge. I didn't intend to stay at home through transition and really just wanted to go to the hospital when I went into hard labor. I realize that dilating to nine centimeters unsupervised at home isn't the safest thing in the world. Luckily, Paul knew the signs of transition and was able to rush me to the hospital just in time.

As I was going though the labor my heart swelled with more love for Paul than I have ever known. But that changed when I saw him holding our little girl for the first time. My heart grew ten times larger on January 24!