The Birth Story

I'm writing this in a period of extreme exhaustion, but I feel I should put the story into words while it is still fresh in my mind. It's not my best work, but Miss Chloe has her nights and days mixed up and this mommy is pooped!

I will spare the details for some of the more squeamish, but we saw early signs of labor beginning Sunday, January 17. The symptoms continued through most of the week increasing dramatically on Thursday. I had light contractions for most of the night on Thursday night that stopped completely by 8:00 am Friday morning. We rescheduled our 4:00 pm appointment to an 11:30 am appointment just to ensure everything was okay. The doctor concluded that I was 90-100% effaced and 1-2 centimeters dilated. He was nearly certain that we would be having a baby over the weekend.

We stopped in quickly following the appointment to meet Baby Miles and Baby Josephine from Bradley and then it was go time.



I worked frantically until 7:00 pm to finish my last job for work. I did laundry and tried to get my clothes around for my hospital bag. Paul worked all day long packing the bags and prepping for labor. I went to bed immediately after finishing work. I had very light contractions that hardly woke me from 8:00 pm to 2:30 am. I woke at 2:30 am at the peak of a contraction and decided that labor was immanent. I jumped into the tub to relax and Paul came in to start timing contractions. The contractions were very uncomfortable, but I nothing that we couldn't breathe through. Paul was amazing and helped me to relax. After the bath we moved downstairs and breathed through contractions while watching some of the weirdest late night television. Do you know that Animal Planet has a four hour program called Puppy Bowl that consists entirely of puppies playing in a makeshift football arena?

The contractions were very sporadic, which is a sign of early first stage labor. They would come anywhere from four to fifteen minutes apart and would last for a minute. It wasn't terrible, but I told Paul that I could see how even if the contractions never got more painful than what they were, if they were one on top of another this whole labor thing would be very painful! I ate a lot and drank a lot of water the whole morning. We went for a walk around 12:00 to try to get things moving a little faster. I sat on the birthing ball, did pelvic rocks, did squats, and almost any other upright position I could think of, but the timing and strength of the contractions stayed pretty sporadic. Looking back, I didn't admit to all of the contractions. If they were short or didn't really hurt THAT bad I never mentioned them to my loyal coach and timer. Apparently, every contraction counts.



I think around 6:00 pm I started having back labor. This, I will admit, hurt like a mother. I remember thinking that the contractions wouldn't hurt much at all if I didn't have the intense pain in my lower back. Paul would apply counter pressure through the contraction and this relieved a lot of the pain. We ordered Chinese food and watched Titanic. Around 8:00 pm I decided that I was very tired and that we should try to get some rest. We went up to bed and Paul fell asleep almost immediately. I tried to work through the contractions alone, but it was impossible. I got up and took what was probably my sixth bath of the day. It was about 9:30 pm when I got out and asked Paul to come back downstairs.

From 9:30 pm to 11:00 pm my contractions grew increasingly painful, but were still a good four to six minutes apart. My last five contractions at home were so painful that I remembered thinking "Oh God, if this is 'hard labor' then I am screwed and am going to have to get an epidural." I never vocalized my self doubt, but Paul was watching for every sign of transition. I started whimpering and tearing up through my contractions and then I started shaking. Paul had been begging to take me to the hospital for a couple of hours and finally he demanded we call the doctor. Around 11:15 we left for the hospital.

On the way to the hospital I remember having only one contraction, but Paul said I had three. I was out of it and very high on my own endorphins and hormones. I walked into the emergency room area in a trance while Paul parked the car. I was embarrassed because the contractions had stopped completely. I walked the whole way to the birthing area and signed in. I thought the nurses would snicker as I headed to triage to get "checked." I told my nurse that I was probably still dilated to a two and that my husband made me come in. When she checked me her eyes widened and she said "Honey, you are at a nine and the only thing holding this baby in is your bag of waters." Instantly, my mood changed. I was on cloud nine. She kept praising me and said I did such a good job. She said the hard part was over and I was just about ready to hold my baby!

We headed straight for the birthing room where the resident confirmed I was at nine centimeters and 100% effaced. He suggested breaking the bag of waters, which is a big Bradley no no. I said I'd wait to try to dilate naturally, but after four more contractions I gave in. The doctor broke the bag of waters and said I could begin pushing immediately. For the next ten or so contractions I pushed, but not very effectively. Finally, I figured out that I had to "push like I was pooping." My nurse was awesome and she helped me identify contractions and where and how to push. When I finally pushed properly the whole room (two nurses, a resident, and my OB) started cheering. They dimmed the lights and got ready to catch the baby. Five to ten sets of contractions later, I was holding Chole Amelia Tithof! The pushing was intense. I really can't even describe the feeling.

The craziest thing about the whole birth was that I was so so high on my own endorphins and hormones that I was just freakishly calm. I was apologizing to the doctor for waking her and I was making inside jokes with Paul. The nurses kept saying "we wish everyone was as nice as you." Haha! I didn't yell or cuss or anything like in the movies. Everything was just serene. Anyone who knows me (including me and Paul) was probably expecting the total opposite.




Of all the things I have done in my life, giving birth to Chloe Amelia is definitely the most amazing. I know I had a lot of people praying for me and I know that we were blessed to have such a smooth labor. I know I have a high pain tolerance and that giving birth naturally is NOT for everyone, but I would encourage anyone to try it with the proper preparation. Feeling that kind of pain - pain with the most rewarding purpose of a lifetime - there are no words. And it really, truly was not.that.bad.

Now the stitches, on the other hand... OUCH!!! I complained the whole time they stitched. I tried to focus on the baby, but holy crap it hurt. The after pain of labor, stiches, body aches, etc. for me has been the worst part. No one tells you how bad everything hurts AFTER you have the baby.

Anyway, I had better go feed baby and take a nap with her. More to come...

Welcome to the World

Chloe Amelia





Born January 24, 2010 at 1:08 am
6 pounds 8 ounces
19 inches

Say What?!?!

Because there is no great way to say this, I am going to come right out with it. At my doctor's appointment yesterday I weighed in at a remarkable 174 pounds. Never, no way, not ever did I think I would gain over 35 pounds, but here I am gaining a hefty three pounds per week for an overall weight gain thus far of nearly 40 pounds. The nurse tried to be nice and said "Well, it was the holidays." A. It wasn't the holidays. B. How about just saying "It's okay. You're 9 months pregnant"? Then she asks if I have been eating a lot. The funny thing is that I have been eating less and less as my belly gets bigger and bigger. I breathe so heavily when I try to eat that I sound like a little fat kid. Even when I am starving I can only eat one small serving of anything because there just simply is no more room in my belly for food. I've been struggling to get my protein intake. But this does explain why it feels like the bones in my feet might just shatter at any minute. And since my belly and boobs are the only things that seem to be packing on the pounds, I am becoming fairly certain that we are going to have a big baby.

The doctor did confirm that Chloe is in the head down position. Yay! We had to have the Group B Strep Test and will find out the results next week. Please pray that I do not carry the bacteria, because while it is very treatable, I would be tethered to an IV the entire time I'm in the hospital.

36 Week Update

Paul and I toured the birthing center at St. Mary's Hospital yesterday night. There were tons of people on the tour and the nurses were very surprised. Let's hope we don't all show up on the same day. The birthing center was on the top floor of the hospital and the rooms actually had beautiful views despite the hospital's location in a shadier area of Grand Rapids. We were told where to park and register. We saw the triage rooms where they decide if you should actually be admitted to the hospital. These are not very private and so I am happy to be educated enough to hopefully know when I am definitely in labor. The birthing rooms are private and feature a whirlpool tub, birthing ball, chair for dad, and everything else you could imagine. The rooms were very nice and so were all of the nurses.

The only problem I foresee is the brutal walk from the parking lot. It was about a five minute speed walk, which I think would translate into a much longer in-labor walk. They do have wheelchairs at all of the entrances, but since we are planning to labor at home for a while until the contractions are fairly close together and consistent, I can see how the trip to the nurse's station will be a long one.

After the tour we headed down to the first floor to see if we could squeeze our way into the infant CPR class. The class is only held once per month and I tried to register earlier this week. The scheduler told me the class was full for the next few months. When we showed up to the class the nurse said she was surprised someone would tell us that because she only had three couples signed up. So we were lucky enough to learn infant/child CPR and the Heimlich Maneuver last night. The process is actually very easy, and I feel so much better now that I know how to do it; however, we pray that we never need to use our new skill.

I have been having Braxton Hicks contractions for about a week. Some women say these are painful, but mine are not painful at all. Actually, it is hard to distinguish whether she is kicking me and leaving her legs extended or if I am having a contraction. It is obvious if I feel my belly because it goes from having the give of a volleyball to the give of a rock. I get them mostly when I am stressed at work and occasionally when baby is kicking around too hard. My belly has not dropped and I do not feel like her head is deeply engaged in my pelvis, so I am fairly certain that labor will not be occurring "any day now." Besides, I need the rest of this month at least to finish some projects at work and get the nursery finished!

I haven't had much swelling. I did take off my wedding ring and instead put on an old ring Paul bought for me. Nothing like being eight months pregnant without a wedding band! I didn't really NEED to take the ring off yet, but I started to get very paranoid that I would wake up one morning with sausage fingers and it would be stuck.

My belly, on the other hand, continues to SWELL! I have been getting so angry lately because I spill everything on my belly. Just yesterday I was at work and I was eating a piece of chocolate. Somehow I ended up getting chocolate all down the front of my shirt. Great. As if I don't feel like a hippopotamus already! Speaking of that, we were in the grocery store last weekend when I noticed some delicious donuts in the bakery section. Paul's friends were coming over and were planning to stay the night so I yelled to Paul, "Hey, do you want some donuts?" Well, unfortunately about five people stopped, looked at my belly, and smirked. Damn! How cliche! Then about ten minutes later the lady at the deli asks me "Well, did you get your donuts? He can't exactly tell you 'no' right?" I'm glad my big pregnant belly is so amusing to so many people.

Bradley Method

We finished up our last of twelve Bradley classes on December 7th. The class was every Monday and lasted a full two hours. We ended up meeting four great couples and had a lot of fun at every class. Most nights we spent a good 25%-50% of the time cracking jokes and goofing around while our instructor, Lisa, struggled to capture our full attention.

Paul and I discovered that we are far more immature than we originally thought as neither of us could watch a live birth video without laughing or looking away. It didn't help that most of the labor videos we watched were filmed in the 70's and 80's. The men were always shirtless with bushy beards and the women were rocking the Amazon down below. One time Paul and I were holding our laughter back so hard that I ended up crying and had to practice my deep breathing in order to calm down before Lisa flipped on the lights.

But in the end I honestly believe I am more educated about labor and delivery than most women who have already given birth. In my mind I have a clear picture of my perfect labor and my worst nightmare labor, and I'm just hoping for something in the middle. I think that in the end we learned how to be our own advocates. You can't ask for what you want when you don't know what you want. I know that God is always in control, but now I feel that I can help make the decisions that will lead us to a natural birth the way God intended. It won't be long now before we put all of our knowledge to the test!

Happy New Year!

First of all I should mention that my 26th birthday was wonderful. The best part? No hangover! I did decide that since I have lost a whole year of my 20's to pregnancy that I can be 25 again this year if I so choose. This birthday was special in more than one way. My new friend Sally from Bradley pointed out that there was a Blue Moon on my birthday. According to her blog:

"A lunar month lasts 29.53 days. This is how long it takes for the Moon to make a cycle though all of her phases: New Moon, Waxing Crescent, First Quarter, Waxing Gibbous, Full Moon, Waning Gibbous, Third Quarter, Waning Crescent, and New again. Because the months of our annual calendar average thirty days there is generally only one full moon a month. But, every now and then – once in a “blue moon” to be exact, there will be a month with two full moons!

When a month has two full moons, the second moon is called a “Blue Moon.” Blue moons are rather rare, and that is why the saying goes “once in a blue moon.” In fact they only happen once every 2.72 years. The next time we will see a blue moon will be August of 2012."

While we actually never got to see the moon, I still thought that was pretty cool! Sara, Matt, and my parents came to dinner for my birthday. We went to Bonefish Grill and it was so delicious. I had a nonalcoholic martini with a glow stick in it so that I looked like a pregnant lush. We played a few games when we got home and then passed out on the couch watching football. I woke up about 30 seconds before midnight to watch some guy jump across a bridge in a race car, but we didn't see the ball drop. We were then blessed with the sound of people in the surrounding ghetto blasting their guns at the stroke of midnight (because the bullets disappear into the sky and do not come down to hit people/cars/homes).

Here is my 35 week belly shot:



As of late, my thoughts about the pregnancy have changed from "oh my gosh I'm pregnant" to "holy crap I'm having a baby." In light of this, I have been taking as much time as possible to enjoy all of the things we non-parents take advantage of on a daily basis. For example, lately I like to sit on the couch in the morning and just enjoy the silence and cleanliness of our peaceful home. Our life is so free and easy, shopping when we want to shop, sleeping when we want to sleep, and showering when we want to shower. Many new parents say that we won't be able to imagine how we lived our lives before Chloe. I am sure that very soon I will be saying the same thing and so I thought I would post it here so that I can look back and learn that we did have a life before Chloe and it was E.A.S.Y. We were well fed, well rested, and well dressed.

Some days I feel I am stuck in some sort of purgatory where one side of me is clinging to our old, easy life. Just the three of us. The best husband in the world who cooks gourmet meals, fixes things when needed, and loves me unconditionally, the best doggie in the world who sleeps most of the day, goes in his crate when we want to leave, and loves me unconditionally, and me. Lucky me! And then there is this other side of me that bitch slaps the old me. The new side of me can't wait to meet our baby girl. I imagine what she will look like and what she will act like. I imagine hauling her around on my hip and laughing with her when she starts to do silly things. I imagine her tugging on Griff's ears and trying to ride him around like a pony.

I know this internal battle between the old me and new me is common in the last month of pregnancy. Everyone said I would start to have mini anxiety attacks when I realized that HOLY CRAP I'M HAVING A BABY. I have so much to do this last month that I hardly have time to analyze these thoughts. I'm sure that as the month progresses I will become more and more focused on what lies ahead and less concerned about the past. After all, I have the Lord to guide me and comfort me. He will give us confidence and strength for this new journey, and I know I will look back and laugh to think I would ever miss my "old" life.

Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and His understanding no one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." Isaiah 40:28-31

Me, Griff, and Chloe:

A Few Annoying Things

Before I forget, I should make note of a few pregnancy related things. Just the other day my boss asked if I was getting uncomfortable from the pregnancy. I told him that I rarely even noticed I was pregnant because Chloe is such a good girl. Well not 24 hours later I found myself sitting in my computer chair with ribs so numb I thought they were bruised or cracked. I have decided that at 5'2'' there is just very little room in my abdomen once in the sitting position. While Chloe spends the work day kicking my ribs, my back also starts to complain from being all hunched over and tense from the kicking. So to my surprise, working is actually becoming very challenging. I have found that I am still totally comfortable as long as I am standing or lying down. I am considering setting up a work space on the couch so that I can lie down while I work.

I shouldn't even put this into words since it bit me in the butt last time, but I still sleep like a baby. A lot of pregnant women say they have to get up four or five times at night to use the bathroom, but I typically wake up once or not at all. As long as I have my body pillow, sleeping is the best part of the day!

Another annoying thing is that for the last 10 weeks or so the top of my belly has been burning as my skin stretches. The bottom part of my belly had a little more give, but the top part of my belly has never had any chub on it so it is a little tougher for baby to make room up there. I wish she would just give up, but she seems determined to use up every corner of my belly. I spend a lot of time scratching the top of my belly and pushing her little feet out of my ribs.

With the baby taking up more and more space in my belly I am finding that it is harder and harder to breathe. Every week I read aloud to Paul what the baby will be up to in the coming week and each week I get more and more winded as I read. My walk into work is about three blocks plus two flights of stairs. When I get to the office I am quite winded. I've read this is completely normal, but is yet another annoying thing.

I can tell that Chloe is positioned head down because she gets the hiccups in the lower left side of my abdomen and kicks my ribs with lethal force. I continue to do my pregnancy exercises to keep her positioned properly so hopefully she stays put for the remaining six weeks.